Scarcity around “not enough” sits in our base. It activates survival based issues: whether we feel safe in the world or not, supported or not, and our attitude towards food, material goods, money and sexuality.
Scarcity feeds off of: FEAR!
I’m afraid there won’t be enough for ME!
I’m afraid there won’t be “a piece of the pie” left for me so I gotta get mine while I can! Because I concluded that this is not a supportive world. Because I believe there isn’t enough for everyone.
Where does this come from? Collectively, in Europe we were raised by a generation that faced wars and their aftermath (if your parents were born before the 60s). For those from the former USSR or other parts of the world, this reality dragged on much more recently, and in some places is still going on. Ok, so there is a collective mentality we inherited. What else?
At the individual level we all made a conclusion as a child that this world is not supportive, or it is not safe (to some degree or extent). From things we either heard and saw and felt around us, our indirect experiences. And from the way we interpreted our direct experiences. Conclusions like: “it’s a jungle out there” or that the world is based on “survival of the fittest”, “dog eat dog world”, etc.
What’s at the core of that? That this world is NOT loving, or that there is not enough love out there.
Ok. That’s about the world out there. Now what about inside of us?
Once we make that conclusion, competition to survive kicks in: hoarding, stealing (taking without consent), sneaking, lying, etc. We gotta fight for my piece of the pie, no one is just gonna give it to us. “There is no free lunch”, “Money doesn’t grow on tress”, etc. So we even gotta struggle for it; the famous: “I have to work hard and struggle to survive, to make it, to earn a living”. Deep down inside we know that we are willing to step over others to make it. We may feel ashamed about that and try to hide it, but down deep inside we know we will do anything, or almost anything, to survive!
When all is said and done, what’s at the core of the scarcity we feel inside?
There’s usually: “I’m not good enough”, “I’m not important enough”… What ever kind of not enough, fill in the blank as you wish: pretty/ handsome enough, smart enough, strong enough, etc. But basically it boils down to: I am not enough.
And… behind that? Even beneath that layer? What really sustains scarcity inside?
It’s the conclusion you made, again as a child: “I am not lovable enough as I am”. You made that decision because to be loved and be accepted in your home, some things had to change… things about you! About your behavior or way of being, about your energy, about some qualities you embodied. If I am not lovable enough as I am, there is something wrong with me, there is something broken in me, so… then: I should not exist! THAT is what is at the core of scarcity inside each and every one of our base! THAT’s where the scarcity is rooted, in my apologetic existence!
And from our perspective at that time LOVE = SURVIVAL. We concluded that if those who raise us don’t love us enough, there is a real fear of physical survival, of being fed, clothed, sheltered, protected. If they don’t love us, “they” may just abandon us and we will die! Actually, THIS is the moment we abandon our real selves! That’s the trade off we make: aspects of our true self for what we believe is more loveable. THIS is the core abandonment wound!
Once we make these two conclusions (to various degrees), that 1) this world is not safe or loving enough, and 2) I am not loveable enough, then the trade offs begin, the bartering. We initiate ourselves into our first negotiations! And we come to the negotiation table again and again and again. So there begins your journey to make yourself lovable ENOUGH, more acceptable and therefore “earn your keep”, convince “them” that you “should exist!” This is how we develop our fear-based survival strategies! These two decisions are the foundation stones of our wound-based personality. Our apology for existing! We let go of parts of our essence, trade them in for what is “more loveable” or “more acceptable”. We find ways to “make it” in the world, survive, ensure we get our piece of the pie! We abandon ourselves, we forget our true self.
As long as this programing of survival and scarcity is running in your base and heart, there will NEVER BE ENOUGH! The world will never be safe enough. Your partner will never be loving enough. You will not be able to let go enough, relax enough, trust enough. There will not be enough sex, or with enough partners, or in amazing enough ways. You will continue to stuff yourself at buffets or social gatherings where food and drink are “free”. You will need to update to the latest gadgets, the faster connection, the immediate satisfaction, so that you don’t have to feel the scarcity in your base or your heart. And money will not come, will not stay, or will just not be enough, no matter how many 0s there are.
As long as this programing is running in your base, YOU will NEVER BE ENOUGH! You will want the name brands, degrees, awards and other status symbols that let others know: you made it! You definitely earned the right to exist! But deep inside, you will continue to feel the need to prove yourself, to survive, apologetically. You will not be loveable enough, perfect enough, strong enough, clever enough, attractive enough, smart enough, successful enough, and on and on and on.
Scarcity thrives off of survival, your conclusion that there is not enough and that you are not enough!
What if you stopped identifying with that conclusion?
What if you stopped the continuous negotiations and tradeoffs which by now have become so automatic and unconscious you don’t even realize you are doing it? Yes, that means doing shadow work.
What if you truly believed that you deserve it all… simply because you exist?!?!??!
What if you no longer played the “piece-of-the-pie game”? No longer content to have a piece, or even the whole pie. What if you knew yourself as the pie itself?
As Bruce Lyon, a mentor and soul friend, once said to me (I’m paraphrasing here): some people come hungry, some people come as food, either way life is a feast!
So how to do this? Well this is how I did it:
- Clean out of your base and heart all the shadows and distortions which keep you identified with the negotiations and trade-offs, that keep you in the fear-based wound-based survival strategy.
- Connect to the power of life force energy that comes from the Earth into your base, which lets you know that you are indeed supported, held, loved.
- Reclaim your essence as a Soul and remember your purpose in this life, let go of the identity of a merchant in a bazaar bartering your energies and qualities for bread crumbs.
- Marry the two and in their union, open yourself to know Spirit! Know yourself as an indestructible vessel of love in the world! This is the only way to stand for the love you ARE in this world!
Each time you barter, each time you negotiate, each time you buy into the “survival” game… you choose fear over love! Let that sink in. You contribute to your own perception of this world not being loving, and others come to the same conclusion as a result. You continuously re-create the reality you are so desperately trying to break free from.
AND… you have a choice! YOU REALLY DO!!!
The power and wisdom stored at your base when it’s free, of your wild, untamable animal nature, backed by the Life Force that flows through the Earth! This is the energy that creates mountain ranges, erupts volcanoes, and flows water throughout the world… and makes pies! Know yourself as the force of nature you are!
The power of knowing yourself as eternal, as a soul with a purpose, backed by the Life Force which flows through the Cosmos! This is the energy that aligns your purpose with planetary purpose. You are the cause of evolution not it’s mere effect.
The combination of these two allows you to stand in the world for what you hold most sacred, as love, unapologetically, and shine bright!
You want to live in a loving and supportive world?
Then BE that which you want to see all around you!
You want to know yourself as not only enough but abundant?
Then BE that which you were always meant to be!
Enough with the piece of the pie scarcity mentality BS!!!
God doesn’t make mistakes! The fact that you are here to begin with is enough evidence that you SHOULD exist, that you are loved and supported. Do you dare to own THAT reality!?!?!
If you do, these two initiations are focused on supporting you to do that:
Another supportive piece around this theme which can inspire you:
By Bruce Lyon on Eros and Money: