The quintessential representation of the Mother archetype is Mother Mary. Whether you are Christian or not, this representation has most likely had some effect on your psyche, and certainly on the society you live in (whether you are a man or a woman).
Most of us women have a visceral reaction when we hear “Mother Mary”. So consider, what does she bring out in you? Is it a longing for devotion, acceptance, and unconditional love? To be able to surrender to something greater then you, to allow yourself to be guided by your heart? Is it a resistance or anger towards the de-sexualization of the feminine (Mother Mary was and died a virgin after all) in order for women to be regarded as pure, as sacred, as valuable/ worthy, or as “a good woman”? Or the frustration of trying to live up to a standard set in her name, repeatedly falling off the pedestal?
The separation between our sexuality and heart, and the shunning of women’s sexuality in general, has led women and men all over the world to disconnect from their feminine’s natural sexual juice, desires, power; keep themselves and each other small in order to appear less threatening; reject devotion and worship as “weak” qualities; feel unworthy of love; not know how to surrender; unable to unite sexuality and love in relationships; disconnect from their own sexuality when they become mothers; avoid becoming mothers in fear of loosing their connection to their sexuality or their spiritual path; create the “Virgin Mary – Whore” duality that leaves so many women and men feeling conflicted between these “polarities”.. and the list goes on!
AND It does NOT have to be this way! This archetype is only one aspect of the feminine. It is absolutely delicious to dive into her fully, YES! The unconditional love, the surrender, devotion, acceptance, compassion, grace, forgiveness… Oh My Goddess! It’s so so healing for us at the individual and collective levels, and as a humanity we need a lot more of this energy!
AND this is one piece of the pie, not the whole pie! This archetype is not better or more Goddess or more complete (or less), they are all pieces of the same pie: the Sacred Feminine!!! The different pieces may taste different to you, you may have preferences. There may be pieces that are like “comfort food” for you, and others which have a taste you need to “acquire”… but they are still all pieces of the same pie!
When we integrate the strengths of the Mother Archetype our feminine (and masculine as a matter of fact) becomes more powerful and we become more whole! This archetypal energy brings me to my knees, weeping, with my heart ready to burst. It wasn’t always this way. I judged it as weak, I had no clue how to surrender, I lost my connection to faith and devotion at a very young age, my love was very conditional and I was far from compassionate. I struggled with feeling not good enough, too selfish or too messed up to become a mother. For years I felt torn between becoming a mother, and continuing on my spiritual path as a Tantrica, feeling it’s an “either – or” decision. Now I know how absolutely delicious it is to held in this energy, wrapped like a baby in a soft warm blanket, the embrace and sustaining of the Great Mother! I know how absolutely powerful it is to be connected to faith, devotion. And I know what a relief it is to be able to surrender!
I worked on healing my wounds for a decade, all along holding as my primary intention feeling good enough and aligned to become a biological mother. And at the end of that decade what I actually gave birth to was… myself! The real me! This is how I have been able to open to something greater then my personality, to my soul, and to trust it! To know I’m supported by mother earth and father spirit, to allow myself to be guided, knowing they are all along holding me, sustaining me. And because I have allowed her to touch me so deeply, I can share these qualities with others. So so grateful!!!
(FYI: Mother Theresa and Amma (meaning “mother”) are more “modern” representations of this archetype.)
Enough of this divide between our sexuality and our devotion and love! The Mother Archetype is inherent in the feminine, she is an essential part of it. Amen for that!!! This does not however exclude sexuality! Devotion to your lover as God, love-making as an act of worship, orgasm as your prayer and Hallelujah, your powerful sexual energy fueling your heart, your immense capacity for love guiding your sexuality, creating and reinforcing the sacred container of the feminine: an integrated, embodied, authentic, and whole… YOU!
Consider this “food for thought”. Would love to read your comments about how the Mother Archetype lives in you, what creates inner harmony and what creates inner conflict? Whether in a man’s or woman’s body.
(Photo taken in the gardens of Highden Mystery School, Palmerston North, New Zealand)